An early morning dog walk on 10th September on the beach near The Kings Hall in Herne, Bay, I noticed above me some action in the sky and stopped and realised what was happening. It was sand martins riding through the sky on warm thermals dropping into cooler temperatures which i was feeling from the ground below them. They were leaving for warmer climbs and on the start of a huge journey.
I felt deeply moved by the sight of them. Every part of me was absorbed seeing, feeling the pure joy. These birds were existing purely on instinct and i am learning now that my intuition need never be ignored.
These powerful moments in nature make us stop in our tracks and often light something inside.
Why didn't I realise this, I buried those rising voices and silenced them. They are my ally, they are my light, my torch showing me the way through the darkness and fear.
The lightness of spirit is visible, tangible and magnetic. Without connection to this I have no wisdom of self, I now have the knowledge that I have been drowning, not flying.
"Not Waving But Drowning" a poem by Stevie Smith says 'I was much too far out all my life. And not waving but drowning.' It was this which was the catalyst for a linocut I did after Covid which I called 'Goodbye To All This' on a reflection this was a call from the deep.
This leads me on to my thoughts on becoming 60...
I celebrated with a trip away to nurture myself. It was a decision I made a while ago and it was definitely a good one. The energy from the warm lively sea was sublime and the Spanish sun warmed my bones.
The year before I was going to be 60 looked like no other. It started tentatively by stepping into my own energy and space I was taking up. I was sober with the intent of staying that way. I stopped drinking alcohol in October 2023 after a break up and deep sadness. My future now looked so different I didn't recognise it. I started some physical exercise with some guidance so I felt stronger and that was like laying some foundations which helped also with my mental stability.
My outlook has now changed considerably and I feel so much possibility. I feel able so push into a space that I didn't think was mine. I have decided to write monthly to give my self some accountability so lets see where this new found perspective takes my creative imagery.
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